aisk very very stressed @.@
how did i let myself into this situation at such crucial moment?
revised so little for such an important exam
always stressed about not finishing requirements and final patients their reports
always feel tired after a long day at clinic/lab
cant focus in what im reading and keep forgetting what ive read already
not knowing where i'll end up in
and this week i had headache since mon-fri, except for tue,
and i always woke up in stress and worry even before my alarm go off, even though it was just a mere less than 6 hour sleep...
why oh why...
Friday, May 4, 2012
Thursday, May 3, 2012
A good reminder
When i focus too much on the problem and my own wrongs,
the problem and myself become bigger
and God become smaller
and i become ever more depressed
Lord, bring me through it all once again pls
the problem and myself become bigger
and God become smaller
and i become ever more depressed
Lord, bring me through it all once again pls
Wednesday, May 2, 2012
network
rmb what the menteri said during one of our recent meetings that it's important to establish contacts with important people worldwide..
been struggling to get extra clinic through proper way...
dropped by clinic a while to let consultant sign a note and happen to see how other ppl do things
- booked pt into clinic which is not allocated to u
- booked pt into clinic under another tutor
how do they overcome the feeling taht u r actually taking away the tutor time from other students as well and how to bother a tutor without him/her feeling being 'bothered'
haih, networking, something that i was never good at and never learnt to be good at, no wonder life is pretty difficult for me right now
been struggling to get extra clinic through proper way...
dropped by clinic a while to let consultant sign a note and happen to see how other ppl do things
- booked pt into clinic which is not allocated to u
- booked pt into clinic under another tutor
how do they overcome the feeling taht u r actually taking away the tutor time from other students as well and how to bother a tutor without him/her feeling being 'bothered'
haih, networking, something that i was never good at and never learnt to be good at, no wonder life is pretty difficult for me right now
Tuesday, May 1, 2012
bird shit part II T.T
kena again......
being brought up not to walk under the trees in malaysia in case kena bird shit...
been ok throughout my life until last yr when i kena for the first time, lucky that it didn't kena my flesh but only pants and shoes, but ewwwww, it took me so long to finally made a decision to wash and keep that pair of pants and shoes (that also was after being 'rebuked' by someone that those items were being bought with MONEY)...
today, kena again... omgggg, and i din even walk under any tree, been avoiding trees ever since the first experience.. and i literally saw a bird flying in front of me with sai sai coming out of its butt, such a graphic experience, and by the time it's over, i realsied some splash dots on my pants, small ones but still shit is shit, disgusting >.<
now the pants and socks in plastic bag, hv to make a decision how and when to wash them again, I HATE....
and thru this i understand the concept of risk.. when explaining a disease or the risks of a procedure to patients, this is how it is,
walk under the tree - high risk kena shit
walk under the sky - low risk
but both times, i kena shit.. so risk doesnt influence whether or not it will happen to u @@
to be 100% without risk, go to a bird-less place but where is it?
being brought up not to walk under the trees in malaysia in case kena bird shit...
been ok throughout my life until last yr when i kena for the first time, lucky that it didn't kena my flesh but only pants and shoes, but ewwwww, it took me so long to finally made a decision to wash and keep that pair of pants and shoes (that also was after being 'rebuked' by someone that those items were being bought with MONEY)...
today, kena again... omgggg, and i din even walk under any tree, been avoiding trees ever since the first experience.. and i literally saw a bird flying in front of me with sai sai coming out of its butt, such a graphic experience, and by the time it's over, i realsied some splash dots on my pants, small ones but still shit is shit, disgusting >.<
now the pants and socks in plastic bag, hv to make a decision how and when to wash them again, I HATE....
and thru this i understand the concept of risk.. when explaining a disease or the risks of a procedure to patients, this is how it is,
walk under the tree - high risk kena shit
walk under the sky - low risk
but both times, i kena shit.. so risk doesnt influence whether or not it will happen to u @@
to be 100% without risk, go to a bird-less place but where is it?
1st of MAY
Omo omo omo (copying the korean movie tone), April 2012 is gone, for good....
exactly 20 days towards my Part 5 BDS @.@
previously, i would expect myself to know most answers already, and will be focus in my revision already, having completed all clinical requirements, final patient (+backup) treatments and write ups..
but now, looking at myself, despite what encouraging words that tutors or friends gave to final years,
i feel that im incompetent, im definitely better than what i was in the past few years but im not there yet, to be able to practise on my own, to be able to sit for finals with the knowledge and skills that i can take away from this school..
- i havent finished my crown requirements (everythign just seems to take longer and i seem to work so slow)
- i havent finished my final patient (what la with the sudden toothache which require RCT in at least 3 sclerosed canals, 4 if theres an MB2)
- i havent finished my final patient writeup (worse, havent started report for backup final)
- i cant answer alot of questions that i expect myself to know, those basic stuffs
- im not even sure if im really gonna sign up for finals (what's with the provisional sign up thing and the rumour heard from another student that no 5 units by 18th may, no sitting for finals *&^%$£")
- my revision going like snail, revised so much lesser compared to previous finals, WTH this is the most life changing one
looking at my seniors from last few years, i think they were so much greater when they were at this stage *sigh at myself*
20 days, how am i gonna finish what i need to do, i've no idea, but what choice do i hv but to carry on, despite the possible outcomes
exactly 20 days towards my Part 5 BDS @.@
previously, i would expect myself to know most answers already, and will be focus in my revision already, having completed all clinical requirements, final patient (+backup) treatments and write ups..
but now, looking at myself, despite what encouraging words that tutors or friends gave to final years,
i feel that im incompetent, im definitely better than what i was in the past few years but im not there yet, to be able to practise on my own, to be able to sit for finals with the knowledge and skills that i can take away from this school..
- i havent finished my crown requirements (everythign just seems to take longer and i seem to work so slow)
- i havent finished my final patient (what la with the sudden toothache which require RCT in at least 3 sclerosed canals, 4 if theres an MB2)
- i havent finished my final patient writeup (worse, havent started report for backup final)
- i cant answer alot of questions that i expect myself to know, those basic stuffs
- im not even sure if im really gonna sign up for finals (what's with the provisional sign up thing and the rumour heard from another student that no 5 units by 18th may, no sitting for finals *&^%$£")
- my revision going like snail, revised so much lesser compared to previous finals, WTH this is the most life changing one
looking at my seniors from last few years, i think they were so much greater when they were at this stage *sigh at myself*
20 days, how am i gonna finish what i need to do, i've no idea, but what choice do i hv but to carry on, despite the possible outcomes
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